Today I woke up sobbing, I had my first lucid dream of my 30's. Trapped inside my dream I couldn't get out. I was crying for my mum but no one came to help me, I was screaming at times but nothing would come from my mouth, I was being haunted, the room was empty … Continue reading Rocky Start
Tag: gay
The End Of An Era
So... Tonight I stood under the last full moon of my 20's Smoking the last cigarette of my 20's Drinking the last whiskey of my 20's 11:18pm Fuck it feels strange Sad and exciting So many amazing times rush through my mind and I gotta admit I had a blast! Though I must admit I … Continue reading The End Of An Era
God’s & Pedestals
You put me on a pedestal held up so high but up here I have no advantage I'm holding the stars saying hello to the moon but I'm further away from you Plant my feet firmly on the ground so I can see you from my favourite spot Eye to eye As we drink whiskey … Continue reading God’s & Pedestals
I Felt Lighter
Out of the darkness came the eruption of my tears and I sobbed and sobbed alone in the dark. Drenched was my pillow and my hands, my bed became a pool and I didn't know how to swim. Maybe it was his kind words, maybe something else, maybe I'll never know but still my tears … Continue reading I Felt Lighter
Nothing But The Rain
It's quite.No sound but the rain and my beating heart.Stood in the open doorway of the kitchen.Dressing gown on, hood up.The house is dark, hollow and the rain freckles my face as I smoke my cigarette.The world is sleeping but my mind is occupied while I stand alone.Nothing but the rain.Nothing but my heart.Nothing but … Continue reading Nothing But The Rain
not so cool, calm & collected
33 day's I had waited to see his face, I wanted to write about it but I've left it too long and now the memory has gone along with the words and what I had said. I just remember drowning, drowning us both in a flood I was creating myself. I broke the dam and … Continue reading not so cool, calm & collected
The Things I Miss
I am hoping that if I write them all down then I wont miss them anymore. Purge them out from the corners of my mind so I can start again. .... Being told I look beautiful, even when I've just woken up. Having someone to call beautiful. A hand on my thigh in the car. … Continue reading The Things I Miss
February Reflection
February was filled with so many tribulations, indecisiveness and uncertainty about my future, my direction, my work, my social life and the way I treat myself and how I value myself. I have been introduced and on some occasions reintroduced to what holds me back, to what prevents me form doing things the way I … Continue reading February Reflection
Too Old For This Shit
Cold coffee from a cup off the floor is all I need in this inner war and the drugs didn't work and the sofa was cold check my phone, do some needed damage control fuck, wasn't meant to let all of my feelings show It's my birthday soon I'm getting old the sun is too … Continue reading Too Old For This Shit
If I…
If I wrote you a letter, kissed with my name would you smile, would you rip it up or burn it with flame? Would you cry for a while or would you run far away from the memory of all the perfect memories we made? If I picked up the phone, what would you say? … Continue reading If I…
